BY: FRITZ VON LUDWIGSLUST
CHAPTER THREE
This stories title comes from a billboard that was hanging on the side of a dirty (change that to filthy) back road just outside of "The Nabe".
The Colon sisters were a ghastly trio consisting of "Liane", "Hale" and "Sammy" who "did" everything and everyone in the tri state area.
All three were alcoholic, prescription drug addicted, convicted adulteresses with Hale being the deadliest no-good doer of the three little cowbirds.
The poor gals, all a little drab and frumpy couldn't really get their own men (not the ones they wanted) so they made careers out of taking everyone else's husbands, fiances and boyfriends. They say that birds of a feather flock together and Hale sure was a real bird... a brown headed cowbird to be exact. An evil, cunning brood parasite that victimized all of the unsuspecting females and their nests within eye and earshot. Hale was a beer guzzling, pill popping bar-fly that went from nest to nest, leaving ruins in her "adultress-wake".
Lil-sis Sammy was no better... a self prescription writing, promiscuous smudge that ended up in jail three months into a gestation period... Illegitimate baby's father unknown, but Sammy was sure that it just had to be one of the five specific donors that she could remember.
The girls went on to be very (in)famous each in their own special way and all tried their best winging it (always drunk or high or both) in many diverse careers at Dairy Queen, the Seven-Eleven and K-Mart.
The trio were even going to start a musical group at one time... wouldn't the name "The Fab Fornicators" have been a great one for them? I'd love to hear them do a remake of Bonnie Tyler's "The World is Full of Married Men".
Of course like every other fake in a small town, the girls Mother (a dry drunk alcoholic) always claimed that her daughters were just to easily lead astray by bad influences. What she really meant was that they were always UNDER the influences... of liquor, weed, coke, pain killers and whater else In the way of legit drugs that Hale could "borrow" from her job at a nursing home.
True to (the Nabe) life the girls were also rabid gossips. I find it very telling and a little funny how a trio like these three feral, eternally in-heat, alley cats were the first to gossip about and put down others in the same position as them. ...Well maybe not as many compromising positions as them. (said best when exaggerated with a fey upper crust accent).
They were nothing but three low-life "Korvas", (and Im being generous here) but this is what a town of hypocrites like "the Nabe" produces.
Time went by as each career-ho dug a deeper hole (leaving many destroyed marriages and wrecked homes behind) to live in, with Hale leading the often shocking, nauseating spectacle. She was soon in trouble again and of course it was with somebody elses man. A real male cowbird, which typically spends its bon vivant bumming sprees eating, sleeping, sh*****g and f*****g, in between hanging out on fenceposts after wandering amongst the livestock in the pasture of life picking at the manure looking for undigested seeds and other free food.
She got knocked up by this one, a real winner... a wife beating, alcoholic, adulterer who would often do lines of coke and smoke weed two feet from his sons crib. A true gem of a guy from a nouveau-riche white trash clan, that had the dirty cash to "buy" him out of his frequent "legal skirmishes". He was nothing but a bull-shitting, blow hard who would leave his previous or current children in a run down shanty with no heat or hot water while he was out at a dive-bar or rendez-vous-ing with his current little canary.
The only problem was, that this skinny, sack of bones in elephant hide was already the new father of a toddler by his third victim... I mean wife. Hale didnt care though, the little cowbird was so happy to be finally having a baby with the dog that she had cheated with throughout his three previous marriages. None of this shameful, sinful behavior was ever a problem because his "mommy" would just pay off the corrupt monsignor again and again and get an annullment on each disaster. After all what would the folk of the "nabe" think of a divorce?
Several years later and the product of this illegal union (yet another sprout of the cowbirds fornication and illegitimacy) has now become a nineteen year old "father"... sans a marriage license... to a roly poly, heavy drinking sixteen year old smudge ( best get a DNA paternity test... just sayin). This all comes after Hales formerly illegitmate son was busted for selling smoke and powder to minors out of the back door of the familys rented shack, while Momma Hale sat drunk in her easy chair knocking down one of her many, multiple prescriptions with a can of brew. They all live together now, happily... that is in between Hales frequent calls to the police for domestic "issues".
And so another fairy tale must come to a close. The End... for now.
CHAPTER THREE
This stories title comes from a billboard that was hanging on the side of a dirty (change that to filthy) back road just outside of "The Nabe".
The Colon sisters were a ghastly trio consisting of "Liane", "Hale" and "Sammy" who "did" everything and everyone in the tri state area.
All three were alcoholic, prescription drug addicted, convicted adulteresses with Hale being the deadliest no-good doer of the three little cowbirds.
The poor gals, all a little drab and frumpy couldn't really get their own men (not the ones they wanted) so they made careers out of taking everyone else's husbands, fiances and boyfriends. They say that birds of a feather flock together and Hale sure was a real bird... a brown headed cowbird to be exact. An evil, cunning brood parasite that victimized all of the unsuspecting females and their nests within eye and earshot. Hale was a beer guzzling, pill popping bar-fly that went from nest to nest, leaving ruins in her "adultress-wake".
Lil-sis Sammy was no better... a self prescription writing, promiscuous smudge that ended up in jail three months into a gestation period... Illegitimate baby's father unknown, but Sammy was sure that it just had to be one of the five specific donors that she could remember.
The girls went on to be very (in)famous each in their own special way and all tried their best winging it (always drunk or high or both) in many diverse careers at Dairy Queen, the Seven-Eleven and K-Mart.
The trio were even going to start a musical group at one time... wouldn't the name "The Fab Fornicators" have been a great one for them? I'd love to hear them do a remake of Bonnie Tyler's "The World is Full of Married Men".
Of course like every other fake in a small town, the girls Mother (a dry drunk alcoholic) always claimed that her daughters were just to easily lead astray by bad influences. What she really meant was that they were always UNDER the influences... of liquor, weed, coke, pain killers and whater else In the way of legit drugs that Hale could "borrow" from her job at a nursing home.
True to (the Nabe) life the girls were also rabid gossips. I find it very telling and a little funny how a trio like these three feral, eternally in-heat, alley cats were the first to gossip about and put down others in the same position as them. ...Well maybe not as many compromising positions as them. (said best when exaggerated with a fey upper crust accent).
They were nothing but three low-life "Korvas", (and Im being generous here) but this is what a town of hypocrites like "the Nabe" produces.
Time went by as each career-ho dug a deeper hole (leaving many destroyed marriages and wrecked homes behind) to live in, with Hale leading the often shocking, nauseating spectacle. She was soon in trouble again and of course it was with somebody elses man. A real male cowbird, which typically spends its bon vivant bumming sprees eating, sleeping, sh*****g and f*****g, in between hanging out on fenceposts after wandering amongst the livestock in the pasture of life picking at the manure looking for undigested seeds and other free food.
She got knocked up by this one, a real winner... a wife beating, alcoholic, adulterer who would often do lines of coke and smoke weed two feet from his sons crib. A true gem of a guy from a nouveau-riche white trash clan, that had the dirty cash to "buy" him out of his frequent "legal skirmishes". He was nothing but a bull-shitting, blow hard who would leave his previous or current children in a run down shanty with no heat or hot water while he was out at a dive-bar or rendez-vous-ing with his current little canary.
The only problem was, that this skinny, sack of bones in elephant hide was already the new father of a toddler by his third victim... I mean wife. Hale didnt care though, the little cowbird was so happy to be finally having a baby with the dog that she had cheated with throughout his three previous marriages. None of this shameful, sinful behavior was ever a problem because his "mommy" would just pay off the corrupt monsignor again and again and get an annullment on each disaster. After all what would the folk of the "nabe" think of a divorce?
Several years later and the product of this illegal union (yet another sprout of the cowbirds fornication and illegitimacy) has now become a nineteen year old "father"... sans a marriage license... to a roly poly, heavy drinking sixteen year old smudge ( best get a DNA paternity test... just sayin). This all comes after Hales formerly illegitmate son was busted for selling smoke and powder to minors out of the back door of the familys rented shack, while Momma Hale sat drunk in her easy chair knocking down one of her many, multiple prescriptions with a can of brew. They all live together now, happily... that is in between Hales frequent calls to the police for domestic "issues".
And so another fairy tale must come to a close. The End... for now.
Chekhovs Three Sisters ain't got nothing on this threesome!!!
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